coming out of my shell

coming out of my shell

Saturday, November 4, 2017

Holding on to the past

I need to get rid of things in this house. A winnowing is sorely needed. When we moved three and a half years ago I thought I had been sufficiently bold in discarding "things." But I still have too much, and it oppresses me. 

I could start with toys, that might be the easiest place to begin. Now that my grandson is in school, the toddler toys and books can go to a thrift store. I know exactly which toys he has not been the least bit interested in for the past year or two. Why don't I give them away? 

I still have a number of toys that my young teen granddaughter used to play with as a child.  Why are they still here? Who am I saving them for? 

In fact, I still have a box of smurfs that my daughter played with as a child.  She loved them, but neither of her children showed any interest in them. Why do I keep them? 

What is this nostalgic mania that keeps me loaded down with family relics? Why is it hard to let go of the past?

Surely memories are enough?


17 comments:

  1. I ruthlessly cleared unloved, unwanted, unused toys from my daughter's collections. Now both are hoarders.

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    1. Interesting. My own mother was a hoarder, so I try to be different; however, it is hard for me to let go.

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  2. I'm kind of the opposite. I tend to purge on a regular basis and have lived to regret it once or twice, but only once or twice. None of our stuff will go with us when we die and I think of that.

    I have a single tub for each child that contains things I kept from their childhood. Hopefully they'll want them, if not...nothing I can do.

    When my stepdaughter cut off contact with us I had to pack up all my granddaughter's toys because they caused me too much pain to look at. They're also in a tub in the basement. So yeah, I have no answers:)

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    1. Oh, that hurts my heart thinking of your granddaughter's tub of toys.

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  3. You pose such a good question and one that certainly applies here. We are in the midst of trying to purge - or at least I am... But what to do with the stroller and playpen my mom used for me and my brother? And what about my Tiny Tears and Thumbelina dolls all tucked into the baby buggy I used as a child. Tiny Tears is dressed in a dress my mom made for her that matched one she made for me. All useless to me now but still stuck in my life.

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    1. I would feel the same way about a Tiny Tears doll. Especially since your mom made the dress that matched one belonging to you. I understand the pull. I just wonder what it is?

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  4. It is so hard to let go of the things that bring up happy memories. I sympathize.

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  5. This is so weird because I woke up this morning and has had one of my reoccurring dreams about getting rid of my kids toys. It’s always a distressing one. What is weird is that I don’t have any to get rid of and wished I could have kept some.

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  6. Moving from the place that owned my heart to the little house where I found peace was cathartic in more than one way. 2400 sq ft to 800 sq ft means getting rid of a bunch of stuff that, ultimately, I decided owned me more than I owned them. It was cleansing once I got over the pain.

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    1. That's so true - this stuff DOES seem to own me. Another reason to get rid of it.

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  7. After reading this, that dreadful feeling has come back, the one I get when something reminds me of the attic which is full of stuff that needs to be sorted and purged.

    Whenever my daughter comes, I send her up there to get a move on. Ha! Last time she came back down with her collection of dress-up paper dolls, spreading them out on the dining table and talked to them.
    I tidied them up a week later when she had gone back to her adult life. How can I through them out now?

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    1. Sorry, Sabine - didn't mean to lay my own guilt trip on you. Ha. I know, tho - that's the problem. These "things" are all wrapped up with love. Complicates things SO much.

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    2. And maybe THAT's it - the love. That's the problem. These family relics still feel like love. Sheesh.

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  8. The things can become opressive. Having little space and constantly collecting new things means choices must be made.

    Sometimes easy. Sometimes not.

    Good luck.

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So, whadayathink?