coming out of my shell

coming out of my shell

Saturday, June 25, 2022

When a young woman dies in Kentucky

So often when you lose someone to an untimely death you ask why? Right now I'm screaming it from the mountain top.

Tom and I lost one of our grandchildren this week to a car accident. Melanie was one of Tom's grandchildren; however, I claimed her and her two siblings as my mine, too. We both loved her with all of our hearts. We only knew her and her amazing family since 2017, when Tom found his oldest daughter, her mother Robin, through DNA testing.

I first met her at a restaurant at City Walk, Universal in Orlando in July 2017. It was the only time our whole family was together. It was when my husband met his daughter R, and our daughter, M, met her sister. We were all so happy.

Her mother told me (in front of Melanie) that Melanie had helped organize a women's march at her college, and that she refused to wear make-up or shave her legs. I looked Melanie in the eye and said, "You're for me!" She smiled in that Melanie way, that smile that lit up the world.
She was only 25. She was brilliant, a Fulbright Scholar, a feminist, both logical and fierce in her quiet ways. I thought we had so much more time.

34 comments:

  1. I'm so deeply sorry for your loss.

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  2. With you and all her loved ones, my heart cries out and aches. Her bright young strong wise spirit shining so clearly. Sending love always.

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    1. Her spirit is all of those things. Feeling the love. Many thanks.

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  3. Oh, Colette, I am so sorry to read this news. Thank goodness you and Tom found her and got to connect with her and her Mom. Now you are there to comfort and support Robin during this sad time. What a tragedy.

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  4. I am so sorry, Colette. She sounds amazing.

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    1. I'm not sure who you are, but thank you for your kind words.

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  5. That is as heartbreaking as it gets. I am so sorry for your loss. I have tears in my eyes, and I didn't even know her. My deepest sympathies.

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  6. Such sad news. My heart goes out to you.

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  7. So sad for you Colette. That's got to be every parent's worst nightmare. Deepest sympathy to all your family.

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    1. Yes, it isn't supposed to happen that way. Thank you.

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  8. You, and the world, have obviously lost a special person. I am so sorry.

    May her memory be a blessing.

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    1. Thank you. Her memory is SUCH a blessing.

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  9. I am so sorry. Such a young life on a good trajectory!

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  10. "I thought we had so much more time." It's a slippery substance, time. If anyone had asked me what I'd be doing in 2022 I'd probably have said: lying as particles of crematorium ash, preferably on some remote moor. Instead I find myself thinking of my brother, Nick, six years younger than me. Dying horribly of Alzheimers in 2015, his mind departed it seemed. Near the end, after a sad hour of blank one-sided exchanges, I asked him if he knew who I was. "You're Rod," he said. It wasn't right. I was supposed to be there, comforting him.

    What you mourn in particular is the loss of potential. A Fulbright Scholar for goodness sake. What might she have done? Allyou can do is cherish what you must fight to retain.

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  11. I'm sorry to hear that. At 25, her life had barely begun.

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  12. Sudden deaths are so hard but doubly so when someone is so young. There is no time to say goodbye. She sounds like she was an amazing young woman and the world will be less without her.
    Sending hugs and love.

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  13. Colette, no words....just a hug from Portland. I am so very sorry for all who loved her and for the incredible potential lost.

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  14. My condolences to you and the rest of the family.

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  15. Colette, I am so sorry to hear this terrible news. She sounds like an amazing person and I'm sure many lives were affected positively by her organizing and her outlook. Sometimes there is no justice in the world.

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  16. I'm so very sorry. I was going to finish with 'for your loss', but really, it sounds like a great loss for the world.

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  17. I am so very sorry to hear of this tragic loss and premature departure of your precious Granddaughter! No Words will be adequate, so I leave you with a virtual Hug my Friend.

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So, whadayathink?