Solitaire

Yesterday I hung out with our grandson, N. We went downtown and looked at books, games, and clever Halloween thingies. Then we bought an ungodly amount of french fries which we took back to my house to share with Grandpa. We all watched a game show on Netflix called "Is it Cake?" Later I took N home, and while we waited for his parents to return I taught him the card game solitaire. 

My maternal grandfather taught me solitaire about 60 years ago. It was the only time I spent any time alone with him (he had 36 grandchildren), and he was so kind and sweet. 

Solitaire seemed like the best card game in the world to me, because you could play it by yourself. You could cheat if you wanted to, and no one would know or care, except you. I quickly realized that winning because I cheated wasn't nearly as exciting as when the random luck of the draw enabled me to win. It was a private learning experience that stayed with me.

Now I've taught my grandchild. I can only hope that in 60 years he'll remember this.

  

Some pictures from Animal Kingdom

Today I'm going to Epcot with my daughter and granddaughter. We all own annual passes for Florida residents. They were expensive enough that we go to the parks often to justify the absurd expense. I favor Animal Kingdom, but daughter and granddaughter like Epcot. I happily shuffle along with the younger ones. Well, usually behind them. They look back occasionally to make sure I'm still there, ha. Don't worry, I won't let them out of my sight.  

Today we're eating lunch in Japan. Granddaughter E is leaving soon for London, and I'm happy to spend this time with her. I think today I'll try a vegetarian sushi roll. Why not?

Last week grandson N was not in school yet, so we all went to Animal Kingdom. The best things about Animal Kingdom are all the shaded areas and animals. I will always be a sucker for the Safari bus ride. Here are some pics of Animal Kingdom.

Nicobar Pigeon

Victoria Crowned Pigeon

Ibis

Rhino

Elephants

Giraffe

I don't remember what this is.  

 Bongo

Crinum Lily

Flamingos

My grandchildren

My grandson, N, starts 7th grade today. Yeah, I don't know how that happened, either. It really does seem like yesterday that he was a 3 year old.  

I think back to my own 7th grade experience, and I know he is in for big changes this year. Although he and I are the same height today, he'll be taller than me by the end of the school year. His voice may change. He will develop new interests. He will become a teenager.  

His older sister, E, is going to London for the fall semester. She is a junior in college, and I'm looking forward to her having a great and wondrous time. She'll be back at Christmas when she will be older, wiser, and more worldly. I will be in awe of her when she returns. I'm in awe of her now.

These two! My heart is full of love.

Choosing fun.

I took my daughter and two grandchildren to see Kung Fu Panda 4. Grandpa Tom and MV (our son-in-law) opted not to come. 

The story was predictable. However, this movie was beautifully drawn and colored. I like cartoon drawings, but so often the artists spend more time on the characters than the surrounding view. The rendered views in this movie were gorgeous. I concentrated on the art, as I used to when I attended mass as a child. Life presents many opportunities for entertainment.

The daughter and grandkids were laughing out loud, clearly enjoying every minute of it. That was the best part of the movie for me, being with them. I was still holding this experience close to my heart when I fell asleep last night, which made for good dreams.

After the movie, we went for ice cream at the creamery across the way. This has now become part of the movie viewing tradition for the four of us. 

I had burnt butter bourbon flavored ice cream. It was amazing.  

Take your time, enjoy the views

Halloween approaching

I bought a pumpkin, but I can't put it outside or the Florida heat will make it rot.  So it is sitting in my dining room until Halloween.  Sometimes I buy two so that both Tom and I get a chance to carve one.  I don't think I will this year.  I'm not all that interested.  

Our granddaughter was home from college last weekend, so I got two small pumpkins for her and her brother.  I thought they might like to paint them, but they insisted on carving.  They turned out pretty cute.

Card tricks and magnets

Our grandson N is in middle school now.  He's rarely silly anymore, darn it.  A couple months ago he stopped hugging me hello or goodbye. I knew it would happen eventually, but I didn't see it coming so soon. Darn! I never had a boy child, so male growing pains are new to me. It's quite interesting.  

He came over alone the other day to make cookies. He swaggered in and took over the kitchen. He likes to cook, and has created his own special cookie recipe. The cookies are good, too. He started right in, not needing my advice or help in any way, shape, or form.  

When the cookies were done, he played with magnets for a while, and then wanted to go home. We couldn't take him right then. I needed to find something to entertain him with for one more hour, so I brought out a deck of cards.

At first he entertained me with card tricks. Then he built card structures. I was afraid it wouldn't go well and he'd be annoyed, but no! He successfully build a small structure and he was both surprised and pleased. Finally, we settled down to a game of War. Grandpa even joined in. It was like turning back the clock, back to those old days when the three of us were the best of friends. We laughed, slapped the cards down, and teased each other. Honestly, it was the best time I'd had in weeks.

A beautiful day

I had a beautiful day yesterday. 

It was cold enough that I could stay in bed with a quilt on top of me. That's a lovely way to wake up, and rare in Central Florida. I made the most of it.

A friend gave me an online Jacquie Lawson JL Sussex Advent Calendar 2022.*  Checking on the day's surprises is the very first thing I do each morning. I watch the daily presentation, then find the day's elf (who does his little elf dance when I tag him), and check the special room to see what present there is for me to open. Yesterday it was an online puzzle! Such fun. I'll miss it come Monday!

I picked up the two grandkids at 12:45 pm, and we went to the movies to see Puss in Boots. We bought french fries. I was in heaven sitting there with the two of them. Every once in a while N would lean his head on my shoulder. Like I said, heaven! E is home from college, and it is amazing how calm it makes me knowing she is home.

Later, Tom and I went out to dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant. I had chicken mole, he had a beef burrito. We both had one of their signature margaritas, they are very tasty.  

And today I have leftover chicken mole in the fridge. I might eat it for breakfast. Oh geez, I had to go and google it because I'm an idiot. So many calories! Luckily I have a short memory.

*https://www.jacquielawson.com/advent

Fly home, little bird

When I wrote this (before the holiday), my granddaughter E was in the air making her way home for Thanksgiving.  It was the first time she flew alone. She is 18. Her first flight left at 6:00 am. I was up at 5:30 to text and make sure she made that early damn flight, because I'm a worry wart and an anxious freak. She did, no problems. 

It reminds me of my first solo air travel. I was also 18, making my way from Chicago to San Francisco. My friends picked me up in South Bend and drove me to O'Hare airport in Chicago. When I said goodbye to my mother, I clung to her and cried. All it would have taken for me to stay was for her to ask me to. But instead, in her greater wisdom she said "This is what you want, go do it." So I did.  

Me in San Francisco, 1970, turning 19

Buying shoes for the boy

I offered to buy new school shoes for grandson, N. 

I struggle figuring out things like the right size, what's cool, what's appropriate. A couple of years ago I took him shopping alone for new shoes and got shoes that were way too big. The parents had to take them back to exchange them.  

My daughter, M, was supposed to go with N and me to the shoe store, but she was sick. So I took him alone. Again. Surely they knew it wasn't a good idea, right?

As always with N and Grandma, it quickly became a comedy of errors. For some reason (COVID?) the store had removed all the metal shoe measures. Instead, they pointed us to diagrams on the floor where you put your foot down and try to guess what size you are. I don't want to guess. I want to know. 

Twice I kindly asked an employee to go get me the metal measure. He said he would, but he never did. Remember when there were actual shoe salespeople who fit a child for shoes? Not anymore. It's all a guessing game now. No service, no metal measures, no help. Just N and me squabbling. 

N liked the first pair he saw. Adidas high tops. Based on the guessing game, he tried a few sizes on. I went with the smaller size, as he said they were comfortable. We bought them and I took him home.

Surprise, surprise, they were an entire size too big. His father took him back to the store to exchange them. He made N look around and try on other shoes. They ended up getting two pairs for the price I paid for the way too big shoes. N seems happy.  

I refuse to take him shoe shopping alone in the future. 

When a young woman dies in Kentucky

So often when you lose someone to an untimely death you ask why? Right now I'm screaming it from the mountain top.

Tom and I lost one of our grandchildren this week to a car accident. Melanie was one of Tom's grandchildren; however, I claimed her and her two siblings as my mine, too. We both loved her with all of our hearts. We only knew her and her amazing family since 2017, when Tom found his oldest daughter, her mother Robin, through DNA testing.

I first met her at a restaurant at City Walk, Universal in Orlando in July 2017. It was the only time our whole family was together. It was when my husband met his daughter R, and our daughter, M, met her sister. We were all so happy.

Her mother told me (in front of Melanie) that Melanie had helped organize a women's march at her college, and that she refused to wear make-up or shave her legs. I looked Melanie in the eye and said, "You're for me!" She smiled in that Melanie way, that smile that lit up the world.

She was only 25. She was brilliant, a Fulbright Scholar, a feminist, both logical and fierce in her quiet ways. I thought we had so much more time.

So, how do I fit in?

My husband became a great-grandpa again. His granddaughter S had a baby boy. He's a beauty, just like his 2 year old sister, CH. I claim these children as my great-grandchildren, too. After all, his daughter R is the half-sister of our daughter, M. Is that presumptuous of me? 

We've had this beautiful family in our lives since 2017, when Tom took a DNA test and he and R found each other. It was epic, wonderful, full of grace.  

I struggle, though. Not the wicked stepmother struggle of "what does this take from my family with him," because it takes nothing away. Love isn't a pie to be divided. Love expands. If you open your heart to it, love will fill you up like a balloon.

My struggle is trying to figure out my place. R was adopted at birth and she had a good parents. Her children had grandparents they loved. I can't be what I never was. However, if you can't be one thing, then you can be another. Even if you have to make it up as you go along. It's all good. 

Recently I found an old picture of her biological mother. I was surprised when the picture made me sad. Why did it make me sad? Because it looks like R has her birth mother's mouth. I want her to look like me! Ha! I'm a silly old woman.  

I made a quilt for H. It's not a treasured crib quilt. It's a lay-it-down-on-the-floor and get it dirty kind of quilt. I hope the first time he rolls over he does so on this quilt. 

How much drama is really enough?

I went to Tampa last week to serve as a chaperone for granddaughter E's high school theater troupe at the 2022 Florida Thespian Festival. 

I knew there would be lotsa drama, but sheesh! It was one thing after another. I can't bring myself to recount the technical problems, endless emotions, REAL highs, and REAL lows yet. Too soon. 

There are 49 students in E's troupe. Festival organizers were expecting 9,000 students to attend over 4 days of endless events. There were two large locations, and trolleys to take people back and forth to events. 

E played dramatic lead in a small one-act play that received "top honors" in that category. Some of her friends competed for voice, costume design, technical expertise, and set design. So much talent!

The large group, mainstage musical was presented at Tampa's Morsani Hall, which seats 2,610. It was jam packed with theater crazed teenagers who really knew how to "voice" their appreciation. Best audience ever! One of the other chaperones said it best when she quipped "They finally got the audience they deserve." 

E played the risqué grandmother with panache. She's always been one to steal the show with comic timing and outrageous theatrics. Can I tell you that she got the most applause at the curtain call? Because she did. It was deafening. They loved her and she loved them. She dazzled, throwing ostentatious kisses that would make Gloria Swanson proud! She pointed at the crowd and threw her arms up in the air waving "come hither" towards herself for more applause. The audience went wild.

The mainstage musicals were not a competition. They already competed last fall at district competitions, and only a handful of musicals were chosen from throughout the state to perform at the festival. Being one of those performances was the award. I'm glad. Lack of rivalry enabled the many troupes to mingle, support each other, and enjoy the moment.  

I'm so happy I went. I love that young woman.

Volunteering for love

Granddaughter E is an actress. Anything related to the theatre is her passion, as natural to her as breathing. Her specialty is comedy, but she can perform any role well. It is her gift.

Her high school troupe won the district thespian competitions for a musical and a dramatic play. They are going to the Florida High School Thespian Festival to compete later this spring. She has a meaty comedic role in the musical. She is the dramatic lead in the play.  

My daughter, her mother, asked if I wanted to go with her to the festival to serve as a chaperone for 4 days and 3 nights. That's a long damn time! Of course I said yes, even though I've been dreading it like the plague ever since I said yes. I don't really like to spend days away from my husband. Also, chaperoning busloads of high school Theatre Geeks will be "challenging." They are so ... dramatic.  

However, the chance to spend time as three generations of women is irresistible. 

I know I'll get on their nerves.  I look forward to writing about it.

She's unique, and she shines brightly

Reluctance

This month our grandson N turns 10 years old. I started this blog 10 years ago while I was babysitting for his older sister while their parents were in the hospital attending to his birth.  

His older sister, E, was 8 years old when N was born. She had been the only child for a long time, and did NOT want a sibling. She wasn't interested in babies. The whole pregnancy hoopla annoyed her. When asked to help come up with a name, she offered "Toilet" as a possibility.  

When I got the call that N had been born, I wandered into Eislinn's room to tell her.  She was playing on the floor with her fanciful little characters. I gleefully announced, "N was just born!" She glanced up with a sour look and softly dismissed me with "I'm busy." 

She came around in the fullness of time.  The two of them are quite close despite the 8 years difference in age.  

At first...

And eventually...

Cooking with Grandma

Granddaughter E is 18. I invited her over to make paella. Cooking is a way to spend time alone with her; a way to lure this great beauty over and have her company all to ourselves. 

Yes, we have a paella pan. No, we're not sticklers for tradition. We're Americans, for crying out loud. We live in small town USA, a gastronomical wasteland that would have us exist on fries, hamburgers, and pizza, with an occasional side of coleslaw. We could shop in Orlando, but who wants to drive that far? We make do with what we find at our small Publix. 

I did order saffron and real-for-real paella rice online. We had clams (the only ones at the store still in their shells), shrimp, sausage, and chicken. I confess we used deboned chicken breasts. I know, I know, it should be actual chicken pieces. Most in my family only want white meat, and do NOT want to work hard to eat it. 

E made it, with me hovering nearby. I forced myself to turn away, bellowing "tips" and encouragement, helping her read the recipe, things like that (!). You should have seen her chopping garlic. The kid's a natural.  

She took finishing the top as a creative challenge. In her world, paella has a face. Peas are served separately so those who hate peas avoid them, and those who love peas sprinkle them over the top. 

One family member has a shrimp allergy, so Grandpa cooked shrimp separately, too. Like I said, we make do.

Nice job, my luv!

Just before it went into the oven.  

Play Date

My daughter delivered four wild 9-year old boys with McDonalds Happy Meals at 1:30 p.m the other day. 

We had two craft options. After loudly discussing the merits of each, they voted. They chose the hardest. With dread, Tom and I read the instructions. By then, the boys were in their swimming trunks and out the back door to the pool. 

They swam, cannonballed, thrashed, splashed, and pushed each other into the pool for nearly 2 hours. Elaborate water tag rules were invented, bellowed, and disregarded. Tom, wise and silent like all good lifeguards, sat sentinel.  

I tried to mind my own business, but had to announce our no hitting rule when Connor hit Blake over the head with a pool noodle. And when I heard Micah scream, I reminded Niko that the rubber Disney swords hurt when you slapped them onto someone's arm.  

After swimming, they frosted and decorated cupcakes. I taught them the M&M technique: frost a cupcake and then immediately plunge the top into a bowl of mini M&M's. The result being an encrusted delight. They consumed ungodly amounts of sugar. What did I care?  

They played hide and go seek out back, through the house, and out the front door. Eventually, they decided they were hungry again. This time they wanted hot dogs and french fries, which I dutifully made. They played video games, and only ate the french fries.

I was at the computer when all four marched in. Niko said "Grandma, can we jump on your bed?" I said, "No." Niko said, "Please?" I said, "No." Niko said, "Please, please, PLEASE?" I said "No." 

"Awwww" he replied unhappily as they marched back out.  

 

"I don't want to lose (fill in the blank)"

We picked our grandson up on the last day of school at the end of May. He was quiet. I assumed he was sad about school ending. Later he told me he watched a movie about climate change. Apparently it was graphic, because he is still terrified.  

He sobbed and clung to me, saying "I don't want to lose my beautiful family, my beautiful world." He's nine years old.  Holy Mother of God, that moment ripped open a hole in my heart that may never heal.  For both of us.  For all of us.  

I don't want to lose my beautiful family, or my beautiful world either.  

That baby, that baby!

We had visitors last weekend! Tom's daughter, R, her daughter (our granddaughter) S, and our great-granddaughter C. She is 18 months old. The last time we saw her she was 6 weeks old, an infant, a passive babe in arms.  

What a difference! Now she is a joyful, spunky, interactive force of nature. I am amazed at how well she communicates. I swear she understands everything that is said to her. Her love of learning new things is palpable, and she seems interested in everything.  

She was a little afraid of Great Grandpa Tom, though. He has a white beard, mustache, and somewhat raspy voice.  She kept an eye on him, that's for sure. When he spoke to her, she would furrow her brow and scrutinize him closely. Sometimes she refused to eat her dinner if he sat too close to her. He had to leave the room so she would finish eating. So funny. However, by the last day she was willing to crack a smile for him. I could tell that small victory made him happy. These things take time.  

And we had the BEST time.  

Pirate Pillaging and Play

We had a visit from grandson, N, the other day. Since COVID, N and his sister, E, do virtual school and his Dad works from home. His Mom is a stay-at-home mother. They live about 15 minutes from us, comprising our pandemic "bubble."  

N will be turning 9 soon.  He is a lonely little boy, as are many other little boys in these plague ridden times. When he comes to visit he expects us to play, so we play.  

Yesterday, we played pirates. We all loaded up with "loot" from inside the house and grabbed our weapons, weapons being Viking swords, and a sun bleached plastic baseball bat. There's even a plastic shillelagh from one of Tom's old Halloween costumes (Ogre).  We have excellent pirate weapons.

Then we each claimed our pirate kingdoms in various parts of the yard. The fun involved raids, theft, the absolute glee of pillaging the other's loot.  

I am the worst pirate, I'm afraid.  I AM crafty and ruthless; however, I have a hard time running or even moving fast since my knee injury.  I'm about 95% recovered, but I doubt it will ever be better than that. Still, I'm happy to be able to move. I'm happy to pretend I'm a 9 year-old pirate.  And, dontcha know, I can pillage with the best of them!  Arrgh!

  

How N spends his time in quarantine

He is such a glorious goofball.  Notice the pile of whoopie cushions next to him.  I miss him.